Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed. For all I know, though, I could be tapping into something that really happened. Unfortunately I'm sure there's at least one unfortunate cabbie that's been bitten by an unruly client, if not more.
I sent this to friend of mine. Nice demon! I especially like that although the narrator thought she was a prostitute propositioning him, it's clear he wasn't attracted to her. Making her actually a demon rather than a succubus was a good choice.
I wasn’t going to have that bit in there but I also could not see a realistic scenario in which a cab driver picks up a lone woman in such a state late and night and might not have at least the slightest suspicion she’s making rounds. That being said, succubi are almost old hat at this point. Sultry soul-sucking beauties are out; unhinged terrifying women are the new hotness. At least around here.
So creepy! Great story, and I have side eyed drivers before; I do wonder if they’ve side eyed me, too. An intriguing twist and violation of trust, well written. Thanks so much.
Very nasty. He'll need a tetnus shot. If I had any critique the voice was a little diluted by the end, I would revisit in my own time to bring that sort of "translated" feel stronger throughout because it was actually very good at the start.
Interesting critique. My aim with these stories has been to capture the "random creepy post you might stumble upon at two AM on an obscure forum" creepypasta feeling, and straddling the line between keeping it authentically "a random person wrote this" while maintaining the distinctly evocative and descriptive prose that a dedicated author would use to conjure the appropriate imagery has been an interesting self-imposed challenge. Maintaining that voice of "internet found footage horror", I suppose you could call it, is important to the former so, if it begins to falter a bit, it's good to know. I have another piece coming up shortly that I've been keenly aware dips out of the original voice set in the beginning. I've tried to rectify it in editing but I'd be interested to hear your opinion on it when it comes out to see if I succeeded in striking that balance. Thanks for the feedback - it's very much appreciated.
This is really good, btw! I skipped over the part where it said "fiction"; I thought it was a true story.
Thank you, I'm glad you enjoyed. For all I know, though, I could be tapping into something that really happened. Unfortunately I'm sure there's at least one unfortunate cabbie that's been bitten by an unruly client, if not more.
I drove taxi, for a month. You see some interesting people and things.
That was a fun story. I was disappointed that your cannibalistic maniac customer didn't turn out to be Nena.
Thank you. The original plan was to have her cameo but unfortunately she demanded too much so her scenes had to be cut from the final product.
Celebrities are so stuck up.
I sent this to friend of mine. Nice demon! I especially like that although the narrator thought she was a prostitute propositioning him, it's clear he wasn't attracted to her. Making her actually a demon rather than a succubus was a good choice.
I wasn’t going to have that bit in there but I also could not see a realistic scenario in which a cab driver picks up a lone woman in such a state late and night and might not have at least the slightest suspicion she’s making rounds. That being said, succubi are almost old hat at this point. Sultry soul-sucking beauties are out; unhinged terrifying women are the new hotness. At least around here.
So creepy! Great story, and I have side eyed drivers before; I do wonder if they’ve side eyed me, too. An intriguing twist and violation of trust, well written. Thanks so much.
Good stuff. Love the nasty encounter, very visceral.
Thanks, I appreciate the feedback. I was afraid it wouldn't be nasty enough so I'm glad it worked.
Very nasty. He'll need a tetnus shot. If I had any critique the voice was a little diluted by the end, I would revisit in my own time to bring that sort of "translated" feel stronger throughout because it was actually very good at the start.
Interesting critique. My aim with these stories has been to capture the "random creepy post you might stumble upon at two AM on an obscure forum" creepypasta feeling, and straddling the line between keeping it authentically "a random person wrote this" while maintaining the distinctly evocative and descriptive prose that a dedicated author would use to conjure the appropriate imagery has been an interesting self-imposed challenge. Maintaining that voice of "internet found footage horror", I suppose you could call it, is important to the former so, if it begins to falter a bit, it's good to know. I have another piece coming up shortly that I've been keenly aware dips out of the original voice set in the beginning. I've tried to rectify it in editing but I'd be interested to hear your opinion on it when it comes out to see if I succeeded in striking that balance. Thanks for the feedback - it's very much appreciated.
No worries, I'm really looking forward to reading it.